Nightmare Before Christmas for B&W2s

11th December 2022

Bristol & West 2 [0-5] University of Bristol 3

Report by Tom Varney



Everyone has their rituals for the evening before a game. Some like to have a good balanced meal, lay their kit out and have an early night. Others like to smash back 12 pints and hope they find their way into a bed before the sun comes up.


Those who do the latter tend to find themselves writing the match report...so here we are.


After warming up to an eclectic array of Christmas songs mixed in with whatever Nelly the Elephant remix Dave Vernon has laid his hands on we prepared to face a uni team that had just leap frogged us in the table the week before.


The first 10 minutes were a cagey affair with neither side causing the other much trouble until Hazelwood opened his big mouth and a short corner was given. A well taken drag flick left us 1-0 down. After a number of stray passes and general all round sloppy play we found ourselves 3-0 behind going into the second half. Both goals being tapped in at the back post with Wayne left with too much to do.


Confident that we were still in this game we started the second half much stronger with deflections going just wide and shots being saved well by the uni keeper. Todd terrorised the uni backline but we still could not make anything stick.


Then came the moment that we were waiting for. A stray ball in the D was drilled goalward by Varney only to be stopped by a uni foot. The ball was tucked in the goal by Will but the umpires kindly allowed us take a flick instead...


Up steps Varney with his 100% flick record weighing heavy on his shoulders. With alcohol still coursing through his veins he dispatched the ball low and soft...with it barely making it to the goal allowing the keeper to lazily stop it with his feet.


The umpires continued to generously allow us to come back for free hits when we were through on goal and put their own spin on the interpretation of backing in...but we continued to threaten through Oli and Phil in the midfield.


We soon conceded a worldie and another back post tap in to make it 5 and cement the loss.


Overall not the best of ways to finish for Christmas but it gives us a chance to reset and go again in 2022.


Merry Christmas you filthy animals.

MoM: Todd

DoD: Varney

Defensive shout-out: Dave Vernon for a spectacular goal-line save.

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